APCHMSTRY

14835 - Get Your Weight Up

I was probably 9 or 10 when, for some reason, I decided that I wanted to have big legs. I was playing soccer then and noticed all the professional players had these lines outlining the muscles above their knees and hamstrings. I wanted those lines.

So I ran non-stop until I got them.

Being strong was always closely associated with being a boy to me. This was during a period where all of my heroes, Rambo, Mr. T, He-man, Mike Tyson, etc. we’re all some form of body builder lol.

I was always asked to demonstrate feats of strength for as far back as I can remember. Seemed like grownups who hadn’t seen me in a while would always want to see how big my muscles were getting, so I had to “make muscles” whenever I saw them. At some point, I decided to start preparing for these tests.

Mostly, my mom would ask me if I was strong enough to pick up bags/boxes to carry from place to place into or around the house. Like any smart woman, she used my manliness against me.

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14833 - Trying to Capture that Feeling

I jumped out of a plane once. It was stupid. The risk/return made no sense. Heads, you live. Tails, you die. The odds were better than 50/50, but the upside wasn’t greater than what I had before I jumped. The downside, however, was infinite. The leap I’m making now is into the unknown. A space sod unknown size and dimension. A void. There’s no real plan to hold onto, no job to blame, no safety net to soften my landing, and no excuses. And I’m reporting live as I dive into the arena. As I make this leap however, the risk/return is much more attractive. Worst case, I die broke. Identical to what will happen regardless of the path I choose. On the upside, I’ll have an amazing life adventure unbound by work or a plan or other stuff that anchors you in the worst way. The question is, can I fly?

Yves Klein, Leap Into the Void, 1960

Yves Klein, Leap Into the Void, 1960